


Unexpected

by vivaciousirish



Category: Dear Evan Hansen - Pasek & Paul/Levenson
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Anxiety, Bisexual Evan Hansen, Cliffhangers, Fluff, Jared Kleinman Needs Love, M/M, Mutual Pining, OR IS IT, Orchard, Panic Attacks, Pining, Post-Canon, Sorry Not Sorry, Unrequited Love, i'm actually having fun with this now and will write more, update: it's not unrequited
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-15
Updated: 2019-04-21
Packaged: 2020-01-14 12:49:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,598
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18476572
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/vivaciousirish/pseuds/vivaciousirish
Summary: Jared unexpectedly runs into an old friend on campus.





	1. Chapter 1

Jared had thought that high school was bad. 

Lose your only friend because you got caught up in his lying scheme about a dead guy who he cared about more than you--Jared assumed that his life couldn't get much worse than that.

Of course, that was before his mom got sick, before his dad lost his job, and before he had to take five years off to work at GameStop so he could afford tuition.

"There's nothing wrong with waiting a few years," his mom is always telling him.

"We're proud of you for doing the responsible thing and saving money," his dad likes to say.

And yeah, Jared is glad that he's avoiding crushing student debt. But there's nothing quite like being a twenty-three-year-old surrounded by fresh-faced freshmen in Introduction to Computer Science, who never talk to Jared. 

So he spends most of his time at his apartment, writing code and drinking. He has his own liquor cabinet now and uses it much more frequently than his parents use theirs.

Besides, he's not totally alone. He has Pepper, a stray cat; he's not sure if he adopted her or she adopted him. He has Herman from work, who occasionally texts him about new episodes of Big Bang Theory. And his parents sometimes join him to chat over wine, usually with good news--Mom is cancer-free, Dad got a promotion at his new job. It's just that the good news is never Jared's. 

Anyway.

Things aren't as bad as they could be. But things aren't particularly good, either. And one afternoon is particularly worse than the others. He's just been assigned a group project with two idiotic children who don't even want to look at him and now there's a drizzle in the air, soaking through his hoodie and chilling him to the bone. 

He takes off across the quad at a brisk pace, brooding. He has a class in forty minutes--not enough time to drive home, change, and drive back. Not with the parking situation on this campus. But also long enough that he's going to be miserable and cold and wet, and as he's trudging along the path he notices another nightmare addition to this already hellish day: a series of tents along the path that he's on. 

Great. A fair. Probably full of obnoxious people who are going to try to recruit him into training a service dog or interning with their companies. God, all Jared wants to do is go back to bed.

He stares at the grass determinedly as he follows the sidewalk towards the building where his next class is, ignoring the voices asking, "Hi, do you have a minute to talk about the environ--Jared??"

Wait, what? 

Who the hell on this campus knows who he is? Better question: who the hell knows who he is and actually wants to talk to him? 

His head snaps up and suddenly, he's staring into the blue-green eyes of Evan Hansen.

"Evan?" he squeaks. He can't believe that this is that Evan Hansen. There's something different about him, a brightness in those eyes and confidence in his expression that Jared had never seen in high school.   
Although maybe it had something to do with the polo: he had traded in the blue stripes for a forest green number with the Ellison State Park logo on the chest and the word "ranger" embroidered underneath. 

"Oh my god," Evan says, and stands. He's still in those goddamn khakis, Jared thinks faintly, but god, Evan's gained some muscle. Jared can see every dip and curve on his arms. And his chest. And his legs. Shit, Jared was sweating.

"Yeah," Jared says with a bravado he doesn't feel. "Coincidence seeing you here. Hey, looks like you finally got that dream job of yours."

Evan smiles. Jared's heart pounds. "Yeah, I did. What about you?" His glance falls on Jared's backpack. "Are you taking classes here?"

Jared shrugs. "Yeah. Computer science." 

"Oh, good. Good. Do you like it?" Evan asks.

"I..." Jared trails off. "It's okay. I like the work, but these fucking stuck-up freshmen won't even give me the time of day."

There's a twinge of pity working its way into Evan's expression. Jared won't stand for that. He could just make an excuse about needing to get to class, but he doesn't want the conversation to end, so he searches their surroundings desperately for a conversation starter. He lands on the pamphlets in front of them. He grabs one and says, in what he hopes is a casual voice, "so, tell me about the...job potential in forestry." 

"Oh!" Evan sounds surprised. "Okay. Well, you probably know some of this but it's my pitch so bear with me. I started college as a nursing major because I could actually get a job and make money as a nurse, but also because it made my mom happy...but I didn't like it, so I switched to environmental studies. It's actually a much more lucrative field than people think and..."

Jared tuned out as Evan talked. He actually didn't know Evan had been a nursing major. He didn't know anything about Evan post-high school, actually, except that he took a year off working at the Pottery Barn. Stupidly, Jared thought they might be behind together, and Jared might walk into one of his survey classes to find his old friend, who might find it in his heart to forgive him. But that was a stupid dream. Evan was smart and got scholarships and could start college after only a year, and Jared got stuck in video game purgatory for five. It was a stupid dream just like every other dream Jared had ever had about Evan.

"Have you ever thought about how computer science could be applicable to environmental science?"

Evan's question snaps Jared back to reality. He shakes his head. "No, not really."

"Well, there's a very interesting project we're starting at Ellison that I've love to tell you about..." Evan launches into a description of an electronic tree cataloguing system, and Jared absolutely can't pay attention because this confident Evan still has one of his old habits: biting his lip when he's thinking of what to say next, and now Jared is just watching his lips move. Not that he's thinking about Evan's lips, and how pink and soft they look, and how his heart is beating faster and faster with every moment that he spends focused on them. No. He's thinking about how this is an old friend. 

Yeah, that's it. This is an old friend. Obviously, Jared is excited to see him. That's why his heart is pounding.

Maybe he should suggest that they hang out. Ellison State Park isn't far from the college, maybe one day when Jared's not slaving away at a pointless class or shift, he and Evan could...

"Maybe we could get dinner sometime?" Jared blurts out. 

For a moment, Evan can only blink in response, and Jared internally curses himself. Of course Evan doesn't want to hang out with him. He probably has a ton of friends at his job who know the difference between an oak and a maple and won't bring back memories of the disaster that was senior year. It was stupid of Jared to even bring it up.

"I-" Jared shakes himself out of his internal spiral to see a blush spreading over Evan's cheeks. "I would love to, Jared."

Jared feels his face growing hot, too. "Okay." 

Evan presses another pamphlet into his hand. "Here. Take this. It's about the project. Even though you haven't graduated yet, you have experience--I can vouch for that--and we could always use an extra set of hands."

"Can you pay me more than GameStop?" Jared laughs weakly at his own joke. Evan grins and squeezes Jared's hand. 

"I think that could be arranged."

Evan lets go, but Jared's hand is still tingling. He's not quite sure what to do and he doesn't want the moment to end. But he does want to get inside, because the drizzle has turned into a downpour. So he does the next best thing: make sure there's a next time. 

"Well, I should be getting to my next class, but uh." He pulls a pen out of his pocket and grabs Evan's arm. "Here's my number. Text me, or whatever."

"Okay," Evan responds. "Hey, Jared?"

"Yeah?"

"It was good to see you."

Jared's heart does a backflip. "It was good to see you too."

Jared turns away from the Ellison tent and takes off down the path with renewed energy. Screw the freshmen. Screw Herman from GameStop. This is Evan Hansen, who--Jared glances back--looks a little shell-shocked. 

Jared knows the feeling.


	2. Chapter 2

Jared had thought that life was going pretty well. 

First, the director of Ellison State Park took a chance on this chubby tech nerd who doesn't even have a college degree and started paying him $20 an hour to electronically catalog trees and note their damage from last year's big storm. Jared doesn't particularly care about any of it, but he's spent more time outside in the past six months than he has in the rest of his life, and he's starting to actually like it. The smell of the pines, the grass tickling his feet while he walks--it's not half bad. He can see why Evan always liked it so much.

And that's the other benefit of this job. Jared doesn't know a damn thing about trees or how to recognize damage. But Evan Hansen does. So Jared walks the park with Evan, who points out species and wind-stripped bark while Jared types away on his laptop.

Evan is different. He's so different that sometimes it makes Jared's head spin. But Jared likes this new Evan, this confident boy who still fidgets sometimes and stutters around new people, but loves working booths at colleges so he can talk about careers in environmentalism. His life is a thousand times better than Jared's--he has an apartment and a cat too, but his coworkers actually come visit him, for Planet Earth marathons and Thai food. He has hobbies--he goes on road trips to hike in other national parks and famous trails, he blogs about nature, and he's learning to sail in the nearby bay. 

For some reason, he's let Jared, pathetic Jared, into this life he's created for himself. Not that Jared was complaining. He loves Evan's cat, Pumpkin, and the nights he's spent petting her on the couch while he introduces Evan to Brooklyn Nine-Nine and his favorite sushi delivery place. He reads Evan's blog and they've even been talking about going to Yellowstone together next summer to celebrate the end of Jared's freshman year. And he loves that Evan loves Pepper, and has a favorite blanket from Jared's collection, and sneaks glances at the syllabi left out on the kitchen table so that he knows when Jared has tests and can text him "Good luck! :)" beforehand.

The whole thing has made Jared feel warm and squishy inside.

It's not something he's used to. But Evan is just so sweet and adorable and seems to like Jared, despite their history and despite Jared's utter lack of coolness.

And as for Jared, he definitely likes Evan. 

More than just likes, actually. He's falling head over heels for Evan more and more every day. And sometimes, when they're pressed up against each other under a tree in the warm, wildflower-scented breezes of Ellison, or cuddling under a blanket in Jared's chilly apartment because the landlord turned the air conditioning on far too early...Jared thinks he might have a chance. Evan might like him too, might be able to see a future where they don't have to pick whose apartment they're hanging out at that night.

Of course, that was before he fucked everything up, as Jared always seems to when it comes to Evan. 

But he's getting ahead of himself, he thinks, rubbing his hand across his watery eyes. He has to think about this logically, figure out how to find Evan.

But first he has to get out of the park. His shift isn't over yet, but he scrawls a hasty note to the director that there was a family emergency and he had to leave. And technically, that's not a lie--Evan's not technically family, but it's certainly an emergency. Jared winces as he pictures Evan, nails digging into his palms and breathing growing erratic, racing through the park away from Jared and towards the bus stop. 

The bus stop. That's where Jared needs to start. He doesn't exactly know where Evan would have gotten off--hell, he barely knows where those buses go--but Evan doesn’t have a car, so his bus is the only option for getting away from the park.

Thankfully, there's one pulling up outside the park when Jared barrels through the front gate. He bounds up the steps and practically throws coins for his fare at the driver. Jared can be a bit of an asshole when he's panicking. And he's more than a little panicked right now. 

What had he been thinking? Well, that was a simple enough question to answer--he hadn't been thinking. Evan had taken to calling him "Jare," and whenever he heard that nickname, his brain completely shut down. He'd wanted to give Evan a nickname too, he recalled, but couldn't think of a shortened version. 

Hindsight is always 20/20, he realizes. "Ev" would've been just fine. He didn't have to--

"Next stop," the driver calls out, "Murphy Memorial Orchard."

Of course. 

Jared hops off the bus. There's a plaque in front of him. It reads, 

"In memory of Connor Murphy. Est. 2016."

Jared's actually never been here. There was an opening ceremony, but by then, Evan had pulled away from the project and Jared didn't know the Murphys well enough to go alone. And his idea of fun wasn't hanging out in an orchard named after the guy who, indirectly, ruined his life.

Jared's not sure how long he stares at the plaque before he brings himself to walk in. It really is a beautiful place. The trees have started bearing fruit and it smells overwhelmingly of apples, and the leaves create a gorgeous green lattice against the bright blue spring sky, dotted with fluffy white clouds. 

He's pretty sure that Connor would've hated the place.

But Connor doesn’t matter. Evan does. And Jared spots a small figure curled up against one of the trunks that must be the very person he’s looking for. 

"Ev?" he calls out softly.

Silence.

"Ev, it's me. Jared. I'm so sorry. Are you alright?"

"Hey Jared." Evan's voice is raspy and faded. He doesn't sound angry, just exhausted. "Can't say the panic attack was great. But I think you figured that out yourself." 

"God, Ev." Jared takes a few steps forward. "Is it okay if I come over?"

He thinks he sees Evan nod his head, so he walks over and sits next to him. He tries to keep his movements small and non-threatening--he'd never been good at helping Evan through anxiety, but he remembers that he's easily spooked and Jared doesn't want to fuck up again. Not to mention he's terrified that Evan wants nothing to do with Jared, let alone physical proximity.

But to his surprise, nothing happens. Evan doesn't protest.

"Do you...do you want to talk about what happened?" Evan doesn’t respond. Jared lets out a long breath. "I didn't want to hurt you. You have to believe me.”

“I don’t have to do anything.” Evan’s hands are clenching into fists. There are half-moons on his palms dotted with tiny pearls of blood. 

“No. No. I know.” Jared sighs. “I just...I want to make this up to you.”

He laughs weakly. “How on earth could you?”

“God, Evan.” Jared shakes his head. “Anything. Everything. Hell, we can make a list of every noun that has even a vague connection to senior year and blacklist the whole thing from our conversations for the rest of time if you want.”

Evan blinks at him. “What?”

“I know it’s a little over the top, but I--”

“No--Jared.” Evan shakes his head. “You think I’m mad at you because you said something that triggered me with senior year stuff?”

“Well...well, yeah.” Jared shifts a little, nervously. “I mean, I called you Acorn. I thought...isn’t that what I called you that one day senior year? When I made that stupid joke about your arm?”

“I mean, yes, but that’s not why I freaked.”

“But you came to the orchard.”

“I like the orchard,” Evan says frustratedly. “God, Jared, you’re so fucking oblivious.”

“Evan Hansen. Did you just swear?”

“Shut up, Jared,” Evan demands. Does he sound breathless? Or is it Jared who’s breathless? “You’re so oblivious. I--I’m in love with you, you asshole, and you damn well know it and that nickname was just too fucking torturous and adorable because you also damn well know that you’re straight and you don’t feel the same way.”


	3. Chapter 3

Jared thought he had everything figured out.

He was wrong.

“I’m not straight,” he responds. “I’m gay. I’m really fucking gay, Evan.” 

“What?”

“Yeah.” Jared puffs out his cheeks. “I didn’t know you were.” 

Evan closes his eyes. “Bi, actually.”

“That’s...good.” 

Evan laughs weakly. Jared joins in, although he’s not sure if it’s out of actual amusement or hysterics, but by the end it certainly is hysterics, stomach-aching, eye-watering hysterics that hurt Jared’s heart because what on earth is going to happen when the laughter fades away? Will he ever have this kind of laughter again? 

He blinks the last few tears out of his eyes and in the corner of his gaze, he sees Evan lean back against the tree trunk. His face is flushed from laughing. Jared joins him, trying to steady himself. But there’s only a few inches between their heads, and in a moment of weakness, Jared turns to look at Evan.

To his surprise, Evan’s sparkling eyes are looking back at him.

For a moment, Jared forgets trauma. He forgets acorns and the orchard. He just presses his lips to Evan’s in an insane, brave moment. 

He’s kissed a girl before. Just one. At camp when he was really just a kid. And he’s kissed a few boys, mostly in darkened corners of gay bars that didn’t want anything to do with him after a few minutes.

Evan could be just another one of those boys. 

But he isn’t. 

The kiss is strange, for sure. It’s hesitant but lingering. It’s warm but stiff. 

It’s not perfect. 

But it’s right.

Evan does pull away and stare, wide-eyed at Jared. It’s fair enough, considering that Jared had come out approximately five minutes ago and then kissed him. Jared’s on pins and needles, waiting for Evan to say--

“Oh my god, Jared,” he chokes out in a kind of voice Jared has never seen before.

“Did I fuck up?” Jared questions.

His answer comes in the form of Evan taking Jared’s face in his hands and crashing their lips together again, so eagerly that Jared falls over. And before Jared can even be embarrassed, Evan is on top of him, staring at him hungrily.

“God, Jare, why didn’t you--why didn’t we--god,” Evan groans, punctuating his words with more kisses. Jared lets out little gasps and moans as Evan works his way down Jared’s jaw, onto his neck. “God, you’re so perfect.”

Jared’s hands wander from Evan’s waist up his back, working their way under his shirt. “Pretty sure that’s you, Ev.”

Evan nips at Jared’s bottom lip. “No, you.”

Jared giggles in spite of himself. “Can it just be both of us?” 

Evan leans on his elbows on Jared’s chest and rests his chin on his hands. “Sure, Jare.”

The view is the most incredible thing Jared has ever seen. Evan--Evan staring at him like he’s beautiful. Evan’s body pressed up against his but not caring that he has a chubby stomach. Evan’s beautiful blue eyes, looking into Jared’s as if he can see into Jared’s soul and choosing to continue exploring anyway. Jared is in deep, so deep that he doesn’t even give a shit anymore. Evan Hansen is worth it.

“I think I’m in love with you,” Jared comments, trying to make his voice casual and failing desperately.

“That’s good,” Evan says, and butterflies flutter through Jared’s stomach, “because I’m in love with you too.”

Evan rolls off of Jared and curls up against his side. He wraps one arm around his shoulders, the other around his waist, and intertwines their legs. Jared places one arm over Evan’s and the other around Evan’s waist. This feels stable and safe and sweet, and to cement the feeling, he presses a kiss to Evan’s forehead. Evan snuggles closer. 

“Hey.”

“Hey.”

“I could still be your acorn, you know.”

“Yeah?” Jared smiles down at him.

“Yeah.” Evan kisses a spot on Jared’s neck lightly. “And you can be my oak tree.”

“I vote we do this again sometime,” Jared suggests, melting on the spot. “Actually, I vote we do this every fucking day, under every single oak tree in all of Ellison State Park.”

“Do you have any idea how long that would take? Almost half the park is made up of oaks--”

“Shhh. That doesn’t matter. I have all the time in the world for you." He pauses. "...my acorn.”

**Author's Note:**

> I could write more of this, if that's something people would like...


End file.
